MK listened and his heart raced as the worry picked up with the words Cole dying and then more with it not being the first time?! He felt terrified right now. Cole could die? And Macaque made a deal with one of the things that stole people, like Cole, and changed them forever. To go help Cole in their world? This felt terrifyingly huge. In a way that Mk wasn't sure how to grasp. They'd all talked about going between worlds and others had but this felt suddenly so very very real.
"I don't love it but...I get it. I'd probably have dome the same thing. Just...be careful. Okay? I know Cole will never forgive himself if anything happens to you. He hates it when bad things happen to the people he cares about. It hurts him. So much. And you're really really important to him."
Macaque wraps MK in his arms and holds him tight. He knew this would be hard to hear for a lot of reasons.
"Of course I will be. I knew he wouldn't like it either, he lost it a little when I signed the contract, but the fact that he was telling me it was too dangerous for me to go there didn't do wonders for my confidence that he'd be fine." Also the multiple dying episodes, that also didn't help.
"It'll be what it is, but I don't regret it. I have to at least try."
MK snuggled closer and squeezed Macaque tight. He nodded. Of course he understood. If anyone could, it would be MK. That need to try and do anything for the people who mattered most.
"I get it. I do. And I believe in you. If anyone is gonna be able to help him, it'll be you. I just hope you didn't get tricked at all or anything. Cole says those Fae are super bad news. Like, the worst kinda news."
It's a relief that MK isn't losing his mind about this. Probably because he can understand the impulse to leap in headfirst when someone you love is in danger.
"He's using me, no doubt about that. I can't see all the angles when I'm not familiar with their world or the situation. There probably are a lot of things I'm not catching because of that, but I don't get the impression that he's trying to fuck Cole over so much as advance his own goals. And he seems to like me for whatever reason, so I'm hoping that helps." He encouraged it as much as possible, in fact.
"I'll do my best for Cole, even if it means working with someone who definitely has ulterior motives. Even if it means Cole's upset with me." Macaque can take that. As long as Cole is spared worse outcomes, he can take anything.
"Cole said that if he died I wouldn't carry it with me forever. It's impressive how wrong he is about that." That one hurt, and it shows in his voice.
MK was filled with anxiety over this but he understood the reasons for the risk. Why Macaque would put himself in this position. MK would have done the same, honestly. He would have for any of them.
"I mean, you are pretty likeable. So it's hard not to," MK admitted, trying to lighten the mood. Which didn't totally work, hearing Cole said that and the pain it clearly caused.
"Maybe he meant if you go to another world or we go home and somehow don't remember anything? I don't think Cole would think you'd like get over him and forget. That doesn't sound like something Cole would say..." MK swallowed. He could ask Cole but putting each other in the middle of things felt wrong. Hopefully Macaque would ask Cole about it. Talk that out.
"You should talk to him about it all when you both have a chance. Clear the air. It sounds like him saying that hurt you."
Macaque swallow hard before nodding. He'd usually try to play this off but he's so tired of hiding from MK.
"It did. It's possible that I misunderstood, he was pretty upset, but that's definitely how it sounded."
He can't believe that Cole would think that, especially when Macaque was so worried that he was signing deals to try and help... all the same, he said it.
"I can ask him about it. We should probably talk anyway."
Seeing Macaque like this hurt but MK was so glad he could see him like this. That he could show how upset he was now. He wrapped his arms tighter around the shadow monkey and kissed his forehead a few times.
"Sometimes when we're upset, we say stupid things in ways we don't mean them. Talk to him. You can do it. You care about each other a lot, I can tell. Talk and figure it out." Macaque was still Macaque but this new habit had to make him feel even more vulnerable. Especially to someone he cared about insinuating he would leave and reject them when Macaque obviously never wanted to do that. Like it had been done to him.
"Take your time. You got time. We all gone time. You want me to stay here with you tonight? I can sleep over. We can snuggle all night and just be here. Together. You and me."
MK's embrace helps, it always does. Macaque denied himself that for too long, but somewhere between losing his emotions and the heart game those walls just crumbled. He doesn't have it in him, especially when giving in feels like this.
"I will. I promise." A pause, as Macaque considers something. "I said that if I got hurt he'd carry it with him even beyond death, so I have no idea why he thinks it would be different for me. Maybe I haven't been direct enough about my feelings." Which is a habit he's trying to break, obviously.
He smiles when MK suggests staying over, although... "You don't have plans elsewhere?"
"I don't know why either but I know Cole has always been kinda slow to open his heart. I can't read his mind but I know if you tell him that no matter what, memories or not, your heart would remember him. And if you knew something bad was or did happen to him, your heart always would remember. I think he'll understand," MK said and put his hand over Macaque's heart. He smiled softly.
"None at all. I'm here and yours all night, if you want. Your North Star isn't going anywhere."
Macaque shrugs a tiny bit. Maybe he means forgetting altogether, like happened to him. Forgetting this place. Which Macaque can't even think about, that would mean losing his kids, his entire relationship with Red... and this right here. It would be unendurable.
He holds MK a little tighter and nuzzles his way into his neck. "We'll figure it out. I'm not going to hold anything against him, he was upset and he had a right to be."
--Anyway. "Yes. Stay, please." Get a crash course in what a complete snugglebug Macaque can be.
MK was sure Cole and Macaque would work out whatever happened. They cared too much about each other to let it fester for long. They were close and needed to be. For both their sakes. MK was the same. He snuggled into Macaque close and held him tight. He wasn't going to go anywhere then.
"Then I'm staying right here. As long as you want," He added. Macaque wanted him the whole night and the next day? The next few days? Sure. He'd do that. He would to show Macaque he would be here whenever he asked. How ever long he needed him. No more running. No more avoiding or worry. Just them, together, when they needed each other.
"Never knew you were an ultimate snuggler though. Don't worry. Your secret is safe with me."
Macaque pauses in burrowing his way into MK's neck when he's called the fuck out, and MK can probably feel his face heating up.
If this where before, it would be the point where Macaque pulled away and made an excuse to flee out of fear. Being too close was dangerous, that was how one gets irreparably hurt. But now, there's just the suspiciously warm face, and him saying "shush" as he keeps right on snuggling MK.
It's definitely a compliment and a lot of progress that he doesn't even think about pulling away.
Also, he's still pretty miserable from the whole 'his kids' mate got kidnapped and given obedience drugs which Korone also got hit with' thing.
"Thanks." For staying. He experienced dealing with things alone and he doesn't want to do that anymore.
Real talk: MK could point out Macaque's snuggleish tendencies every second of every day until the rest of time, in front of people even, and the worst Macaque would do about it is grumble about how MK thinks he can get away with anything now. Which is precisely accurate.
Macaque makes a hum of slight surprise. "Of course I'd let you stay.
"I know we didn't talk a whole lot about what happened, the surgery and the heart game and all, but my eyes are open about it all. Where I went wrong. Trying to spare myself from pain ended up hurting me and you, and a lot of others besides. It didn't spare anyone anything, and made everything worse.
"I don't quite understand how you can look at me after what I did, much less be this close, but I never want to hurt you like that again. I only ever wanted the opposite, I wanted this, I just didn't know how to let myself have it."
MK pressed close. Maybe he would point it out. From time to time. MK could get away with anything now but he'd only take advantage sometimes. If one could even call it that. Still, Macaque did have a reputation to uphold. At least, that's what MK expected. At least a little. Maybe a cheek pinch when he got too out of control sometimes. MK wouldn't mind.
Though the walk moved to something a little more serious and MK stayed close.
"I care about you. You made a big mistake, and I doubted you when I shouldn't have. I let my fear get the better of me. My anger too. And I should have listened. I should have realized something was wrong overall and I got lost. And I wanted this too. I don't want to hurt you either. And I did hurt you back.
"Maybe you couldn't let yourself have it because you only really had it once but even back then you let everyone else like drive it. You let them decide what was going on and what you were doing and who you were being. You told me that you wish you learned earlier only you get to choose who you are and what you do.
"You tried to make things better and it backfired. All of us have done that before. Like literally all of us. I forgive you because I care about you. Because I love you. And if I didn't forgive you, I'd never have a chance to forgive myself. Or Red Son or Wukong.
"We learned from it. And you're letting yourself have it now. You have family who care about you and you care about them. You have people you love who love you back. All different and all great. You're accepted and you're accepting that. And here we are. So we both forgive each other and now we're gonna make sure we don't hurt each other ever again."
Macaque pulls back just a bit as it becomes evident that MK is going to reply in depth, say things they probably should have said before if they weren't too busy getting lucky, but he only pulls back enough to look at MK while staying in each other's arms.
His expression shifts from curious, to amazed, to something soft and relaxed and only for MK.
"Here we are," he agrees, while one of his hands lightly cards through MK's hair, grooming but softer. Everything soft feels right in this moment.
He leans forward until their noses touch, which seems to be a thing they do to indicate closeness. Macaque finds that it quite agrees with him.
"I love you too. And I'm not going anywhere." He can make that promise now.
MK watched how Macaque's face changed and it made his heart race. He was so soft looking in this moment and the touch was just as soft. He leaned into the touch and pressed his nose back. He did love these touches. It was soft and close. Intimate and could go either into passion or just stay soft. He stared back into Macaque's eyes. MK's were bright and soft, full of love and trust. Complete trust.
"Neither am I. And I'm glad we're here. Together."
Macaque doesn't look away as MK looks at him with such openness. He gazes right back with an obvious tinge of nerves -- worry about his own inadequacies -- but also with trust that far outshines it. With care and affection and hope. MK's words make his mouth turn up in a gentle smile.
"Together is a nice concept. I could get used to it." Nice here being an under-exaggeration, and his tone makes that clear. It's not nice, it's miraculous.
He's not sure what else there is to say, so he cants forward and gives MK a kiss that's almost lazy. Casual. Something that one does everyday, or at least hopes to.
MK doesn't look away either. He can see the nerves and worry. He was so happy to see it fade away too. The way the trust outshines it and he felt his heart flutter. He watched Macaque and heard the message under the words. Nice was not the right word but the tone told MK the more of it. He kissed back just as lazily and casually. He hummed and his eyes sparkled.
"I could get used to this. All of it. And I want to."
For a moment, Macaque just smiles and breathes. Even after a shitshow like the kidnapping-obedience mess, MK is like salve on a burn, so soothing, inviting, making Macaque melt like butter in a warm pan.
He touches his forehead to MK's. "So could I, kiddo. And we will." There's time for that, now that they're on the same page. Macaque ran out of reasons to fight it a while ago, and they can stay gone.
"Thanks for being here." As evidenced by Macaque's immediate and unending snuggling, he needed it.
MK pressed into the touch to his forehead. He snuggled with Macaque and relaxed into the bed and his warrior. He chirped; gratitude. Happiness. Contentment. Love.
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Re: Action - After kidnapping horrors
"I don't love it but...I get it. I'd probably have dome the same thing. Just...be careful. Okay? I know Cole will never forgive himself if anything happens to you. He hates it when bad things happen to the people he cares about. It hurts him. So much. And you're really really important to him."
Re: Action - After kidnapping horrors
"Of course I will be. I knew he wouldn't like it either, he lost it a little when I signed the contract, but the fact that he was telling me it was too dangerous for me to go there didn't do wonders for my confidence that he'd be fine." Also the multiple dying episodes, that also didn't help.
"It'll be what it is, but I don't regret it. I have to at least try."
Re: Action - After kidnapping horrors
"I get it. I do. And I believe in you. If anyone is gonna be able to help him, it'll be you. I just hope you didn't get tricked at all or anything. Cole says those Fae are super bad news. Like, the worst kinda news."
Re: Action - After kidnapping horrors
"He's using me, no doubt about that. I can't see all the angles when I'm not familiar with their world or the situation. There probably are a lot of things I'm not catching because of that, but I don't get the impression that he's trying to fuck Cole over so much as advance his own goals. And he seems to like me for whatever reason, so I'm hoping that helps." He encouraged it as much as possible, in fact.
"I'll do my best for Cole, even if it means working with someone who definitely has ulterior motives. Even if it means Cole's upset with me." Macaque can take that. As long as Cole is spared worse outcomes, he can take anything.
"Cole said that if he died I wouldn't carry it with me forever. It's impressive how wrong he is about that." That one hurt, and it shows in his voice.
Re: Action - After kidnapping horrors
"I mean, you are pretty likeable. So it's hard not to," MK admitted, trying to lighten the mood. Which didn't totally work, hearing Cole said that and the pain it clearly caused.
"Maybe he meant if you go to another world or we go home and somehow don't remember anything? I don't think Cole would think you'd like get over him and forget. That doesn't sound like something Cole would say..." MK swallowed. He could ask Cole but putting each other in the middle of things felt wrong. Hopefully Macaque would ask Cole about it. Talk that out.
"You should talk to him about it all when you both have a chance. Clear the air. It sounds like him saying that hurt you."
Re: Action - After kidnapping horrors
"It did. It's possible that I misunderstood, he was pretty upset, but that's definitely how it sounded."
He can't believe that Cole would think that, especially when Macaque was so worried that he was signing deals to try and help... all the same, he said it.
"I can ask him about it. We should probably talk anyway."
Re: Action - After kidnapping horrors
"Sometimes when we're upset, we say stupid things in ways we don't mean them. Talk to him. You can do it. You care about each other a lot, I can tell. Talk and figure it out." Macaque was still Macaque but this new habit had to make him feel even more vulnerable. Especially to someone he cared about insinuating he would leave and reject them when Macaque obviously never wanted to do that. Like it had been done to him.
"Take your time. You got time. We all gone time. You want me to stay here with you tonight? I can sleep over. We can snuggle all night and just be here. Together. You and me."
Re: Action - After kidnapping horrors
"I will. I promise." A pause, as Macaque considers something. "I said that if I got hurt he'd carry it with him even beyond death, so I have no idea why he thinks it would be different for me. Maybe I haven't been direct enough about my feelings." Which is a habit he's trying to break, obviously.
He smiles when MK suggests staying over, although... "You don't have plans elsewhere?"
Re: Action - After kidnapping horrors
"None at all. I'm here and yours all night, if you want. Your North Star isn't going anywhere."
Re: Action - After kidnapping horrors
He holds MK a little tighter and nuzzles his way into his neck. "We'll figure it out. I'm not going to hold anything against him, he was upset and he had a right to be."
--Anyway. "Yes. Stay, please." Get a crash course in what a complete snugglebug Macaque can be.
Re: Action - After kidnapping horrors
"Then I'm staying right here. As long as you want," He added. Macaque wanted him the whole night and the next day? The next few days? Sure. He'd do that. He would to show Macaque he would be here whenever he asked. How ever long he needed him. No more running. No more avoiding or worry. Just them, together, when they needed each other.
"Never knew you were an ultimate snuggler though. Don't worry. Your secret is safe with me."
Re: Action - After kidnapping horrors
If this where before, it would be the point where Macaque pulled away and made an excuse to flee out of fear. Being too close was dangerous, that was how one gets irreparably hurt. But now, there's just the suspiciously warm face, and him saying "shush" as he keeps right on snuggling MK.
It's definitely a compliment and a lot of progress that he doesn't even think about pulling away.
Also, he's still pretty miserable from the whole 'his kids' mate got kidnapped and given obedience drugs which Korone also got hit with' thing.
"Thanks." For staying. He experienced dealing with things alone and he doesn't want to do that anymore.
Re: Action - After kidnapping horrors
"You're welcome. Thank you too," He said softly and kissed Macaque's cheek. "For letting me stay."
Re: Action - After kidnapping horrors
Macaque makes a hum of slight surprise. "Of course I'd let you stay.
"I know we didn't talk a whole lot about what happened, the surgery and the heart game and all, but my eyes are open about it all. Where I went wrong. Trying to spare myself from pain ended up hurting me and you, and a lot of others besides. It didn't spare anyone anything, and made everything worse.
"I don't quite understand how you can look at me after what I did, much less be this close, but I never want to hurt you like that again. I only ever wanted the opposite, I wanted this, I just didn't know how to let myself have it."
Re: Action - After kidnapping horrors
Though the walk moved to something a little more serious and MK stayed close.
"I care about you. You made a big mistake, and I doubted you when I shouldn't have. I let my fear get the better of me. My anger too. And I should have listened. I should have realized something was wrong overall and I got lost. And I wanted this too. I don't want to hurt you either. And I did hurt you back.
"Maybe you couldn't let yourself have it because you only really had it once but even back then you let everyone else like drive it. You let them decide what was going on and what you were doing and who you were being. You told me that you wish you learned earlier only you get to choose who you are and what you do.
"You tried to make things better and it backfired. All of us have done that before. Like literally all of us. I forgive you because I care about you. Because I love you. And if I didn't forgive you, I'd never have a chance to forgive myself. Or Red Son or Wukong.
"We learned from it. And you're letting yourself have it now. You have family who care about you and you care about them. You have people you love who love you back. All different and all great. You're accepted and you're accepting that. And here we are. So we both forgive each other and now we're gonna make sure we don't hurt each other ever again."
Re: Action - After kidnapping horrors
His expression shifts from curious, to amazed, to something soft and relaxed and only for MK.
"Here we are," he agrees, while one of his hands lightly cards through MK's hair, grooming but softer. Everything soft feels right in this moment.
He leans forward until their noses touch, which seems to be a thing they do to indicate closeness. Macaque finds that it quite agrees with him.
"I love you too. And I'm not going anywhere." He can make that promise now.
Re: Action - After kidnapping horrors
"Neither am I. And I'm glad we're here. Together."
Re: Action - After kidnapping horrors
"Together is a nice concept. I could get used to it." Nice here being an under-exaggeration, and his tone makes that clear. It's not nice, it's miraculous.
He's not sure what else there is to say, so he cants forward and gives MK a kiss that's almost lazy. Casual. Something that one does everyday, or at least hopes to.
Re: Action - After kidnapping horrors
"I could get used to this. All of it. And I want to."
Re: Action - After kidnapping horrors
He touches his forehead to MK's. "So could I, kiddo. And we will." There's time for that, now that they're on the same page. Macaque ran out of reasons to fight it a while ago, and they can stay gone.
"Thanks for being here." As evidenced by Macaque's immediate and unending snuggling, he needed it.
Re: Action - After kidnapping horrors
They both needed it.