castaside | [Heart Game] From the ashes we can build

MK rubbed his eye like it was hurting. He could feel the pain, feel the buzz of alcohol, and that want to fix things. To apologize. Korone had to come first. He put the stuffing in the bad. MK was happy that Cole was there for Macaque. Cole was good at being there for the people he cared about.

"I'm sorry I punched you, Macaque. I'll say it again outside. I am sorry."

"Why DID you punch him? I never...got your side of that story," Red Son said. He squeezed MK's arm reassuringly, heading back down the path along the right.

"It felt like everything was falling apart. Between him and me. He said he cared and I know he did. I know that...but when he would just go emotionless around me, it hurts. I was scared he was pulling back. That...if he was suddenly over Monkey King and now just wasn't emoting at all around me that...he only liked me because I was like Wukong. He came to talk again and I was so bad at trying to talk about it. About him, his students, and what was happening. He said that all the work he put in wasn't enough for me because he wasn't like...getting where I wanted."

MK was sure he skipped things. It was a lot that happened. From the mission, the first argument, the seconds, now all this.

"I was so angry, I went monkey. ...I decked him. And...things didn't get any better from there."

Red Son listens, holding onto his arm as they move down the path. He considers that. He figured that the whole issue came from a mix of misunderstanding and wild emotions. Macaque being fucked in the head likely not helping matter.

"...do you know why I modified that rule about bulldozer? About needing time?"

"Because needing time is a good idea. Or you...explode and punch someone and then everyone is mad and things blow up more," MK said with a sigh.

"And you get so out of it and hurt you end up going to a bar and getting drunk and just going into a backroom with seven people?" That just spilled out. Oops.

"Seven-"

Red Son had to pause at that because good LORD, how do you even keep track.

"....well, glad you are definitely exploring yourself." A pause. "I would check how Cole is with diseases if you ever get that far." The one advantage of banging immortals.

Listen, he'll get to the rest of that, BUT SEVEN PEOPLE, MK????

"...Yeah. I made sure to go the guild and get some potions. I'm clean," He said with a small huff. He wasn't that dumb. Not after they talked about it before. Still, he was right. Cole and him were working up to it. They just weren't there. Yet.

"I wasn't in a good place. I'm not proud of it. ...Well I'm a little proud since I ended up keeping up but still."

"Just making sure. Humans were absolutely terrible about that stuff until recently," Red Son said.

"I mean...you had a good time? At least?"

(Apropos of nothing, this hallway leads you have to where you came in at the entrance to the maze. So now you just have to go back to the one void you skipped and fill that in, down Corridor E.)

"I did. During it. After I just felt...kinda empty. You know. That's why I did it. They listened to my rules. No marks. No pictures," Mk explained the rules.

"But it was fun. ...Pretty sure I'd have more fun with the people I care about more. It's more fulfilling when it's you guys."

"Emotions do make it more fulfilling," Red Son said. He is going to check down the parts of B and C. Just to be extra sure they didn't miss anything.

"But rules are good," he said and there's another squeeze.

"Yes, though. About time being a good thing. I know sometimes my 'honest' and 'first reaction' are not always a good one. But by having Bulldozer, I understand you want something honest and I should find what that is, I just don't want it to be the hurtful thing that FEELS right at the time. I think it helps you too in that way, right? When you hear Bulldozer, it makes you stop and actually think about the honest thing and knowing that it is the thing I want to hear? Essentially flipping a switch in your headspace?" Red Son asked.

Mk nodded and followed along with Red Son. He squeezed back and nodded. Rules were good. So were talks with a goddess in a laundromat at super early in the morning. Mk didn't regret doing it by any means. He just wasn't fulfilled. Maybe a little proud seven people were interested in him at once. On top of the face he could walk out of the club the next morning.

"It does. And I know I can ask for time if I need it too. It helps my brain slowdown. I might still get scared...a little. About what I'm saying, feeling, and what you might think. Overall, it helps. I'm glad we have the Bulldozer rule. I think it's been a big help. We can talk. Be honest. Know when we want the other to be honest. And if we gotta wait, then we know. But then we know an answer is coming. I guess I was scared I wouldn't know with Macaque. And that scared me so much."

Red Son nodded. "You might want to organize that with Macaque. And say that out there with him as to why, though now he should understand it a bit more now," he said, looking at Doodleque briefly. "A little communication short cut to kick you into the right headspace."

He reaches up to gently caress MK's cheek. "You can get so worked up so fast. You need the reminder to slow down sometimes. Nothing wrong with that, it just helps in working through things. Especially the important ones. Like Macaque."

MK leaned into the touch and nodded. "I think I will. Yeah. So if I'm going too fast or getting too worked up, he can say something and get me to slow down. You're so smart. You know me so well," MK said and turned to kiss the hand.

Red Son hummed and nodded, lifting up his hand to kiss the back of it. "And maybe something for when you notice he's being cagey and its bothering you. Though probably more a just pause the conversation and try again later. Steps for how deep he's ready to go down the rabbit hole," he said.

He looks around the maze. "This place certainly proves it, doesn't it? He wants to go down the rabbit hole. He just needs some time to get there."

There is nothing else of note in the maze. Just the growing oppressive feeling of loss/uncertainty that grows as you continue back toward the other void which needs to be filled.

"Good point," MK nodded. They'd figure out a word when they got to actually talk. About everything.

"I think we explored it all," MK said and showed his map of the maze. "We can just go fill that void now. Which memory should we use?"

Red Son looked at the map and turns towards the first corridor to head to the void. "...I have been thinking about it," Red Son said, voice soft. "This is...a lot worry and fear of things not going well...but also a lot of it going well. On taking a chance. And there...there is a part of me that wants to be selfish..."

"I put the memory of Macaque realizing he loves me in here," MK reminded and squeezed Red Son's hand.

"Tell me your idea. Why do you think it's selfish?"

"Because he loved you before the surgery," Red Son said quietly. "He's always loved you, in one capacity or another. Things didn't change until after and it feels...like a lot.

"I think he was falling for you before the surgery too," MK said softly. "I really do. If the memory you wanna put in fits the maze, it isn't selfish." Mk knew Red Son was nervous about what came next.

"If we learned anything down here, Macaque has a huge heart. And there is room for you in it. You have your own room and you opened up a room for yourself by being you. Not because of the surgery or him being over Monkey King. Because you are you. And he loves you."

Red Son's grip tightens on MK's arm, leaning more into his side as they walk. "There is room," he said. He can agree on that. Macaque cares a lot more than his cool guy exterior would elude to. "I just don't...don't want to force a change on him. I don't...I don't want to force him to keep me." He would never want to force him.

"I want him to," he said. "I want to keep him too. I don't...want to take his choice away, but what if leaving something out does that too?" He sighed, rubbing at his face. "....what about you, Doodleque?" He asked, looking to the paper. "Would he...would he allow me to be a little selfish?"

Doodleque draws a big heart on his page with red fire coming out of it, and then he nuzzles up against it. He draws a second big heart, this one with strong shadows, and drags it close to the first one so that they're interlinked.

"Looks like Doodleque as spoken. Or drawn," Mk corrected himself and smiled wider. "Macaque wants to keep you too. Like you wanna keep him. Trust it's going to happen. I know you can't just not be afraid for try to remember he wouldn't want you to be."

That is far too cute for his emotional anguish, how is he supposed to take it?

His hair flickers with flames, pressing his face against MK's shoulder.

"...the...the heated tile then, I think. It....I think it would also help keep him open to other love, if he wants," he murmured against MK.

[Heart Game] From the ashes we can build

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Re: Level U - East Door

Re: Level U - East Door

Re: Level U - East Door

Re: Level U - East Door

Re: Level U - East Door

Re: Level U - East Door

Re: Level U - East Door

Re: Level U - East Door

Re: Level U - East Door

Re: Level U - East Door

Re: Level U - East Door

Re: Level U - East Door

Re: Level U - East Door

Re: Level U - East Door

Re: Level U - East Door

Re: Level U - East Door

Re: Level U - East Door

Re: Level U - East Door

Re: Level U - East Door

Re: Level U - East Door

Re: Level U - East Door

Re: Level U - East Door

Re: Level U - East Door

Re: Level U - East Door

Re: Level U - East Door

Re: Level U - East Door

Re: Level U - East Door

Re: Level U - East Door

Re: Level U - East Door

Re: Level U - East Door

Re: Level U - East Door

Re: Level U - East Door