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[castaside]

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[castaside]

He could flip the bottle into a portal at any time, but at least Red is moving. Sort of. He wraps both arms around him while his tail keeps the bottle out of reach.

"You can't help him properly because you're too busy listening to Wukong and getting shitfaced and thinking the worst. I kind of want to hit you for my own reasons right now." But instead he just holds him.

[forgingfires]

"He's never miserable with Wukong," Red Son said, still lamely trying to get at the bottle, but mostly he's getting held. "No matter how bad things get, he can go to Wukong. I make him miserable. Made him miserable for months. Hurt him with the full moons. Hurt him now."

"I'm bad. Was always bad, don't know what I expected."

[castaside]

"And yet he chose you. He chose you first. If all he wanted was Wukong," and boy if saying that doesn't hit really badly, "he could have had that. Are you really going to turn your back on him now? Choose for him?"

[forgingfires]

"I don't want to turn my back on him. Wukong said I shouldn't choose either. And shouldn't depend on others to help fix things either which makes no sense," Red Son said, flopping against him. "I don't want to turn my back on him. Don't want to lose him. Lose my damned mind when I think I can't have him."

[castaside]

Way to remind Macaque that he's never been and never will be first to anyone.

But he holds on anyway, because that never stopped him from being devoted. "Then don't. It's not as difficult as you're making it. He gets to choose. Let him. Wukong doesn't get to choose for him either."

[forgingfires]

If Mac thinks Red Son would not lose his damned mind if he lost him, think again.

"I just...I want to stop hurting him, Mac," he said and then there's the sniffles. "I want him to stop hurting all the time. Why can't I help him?"

[castaside]

"You have to talk to him about that. Preferably while sober." Because this right here is a disaster and MK should never know about it, he'd die of guilt on the spot.

He rubs down Red's back. "Neither you nor Wukong get to sit in a room without him and decide how hurt he is or how to fix it. He deserves to be part of that discussion. All you have is Wukong's opinion. So he says that he's the only one who doesn't hurt MK? That's between him and MK. What's between you and MK is between the two of you. Wukong can give suggestions but it's not up to you to take them without consulting MK about it. Maybe he wants you to do what Wukong does, and if so I'd bet my ears that you'd be willing. But you don't know that yet. The Monkey King is hardly an expert on relationships, and definitely isn't an expert on the one you and MK have with each other."

[forgingfires]

"You know I'll be sober in a...in a few hours," he muttered, burying his face against his chest.

"MK wouldn't complain though....he'd....he'd let me treat him terribly if it meant he could keep me," he said, gripping Macaque's shirt. "He has no problems with Wukong, but I hurt him a lot and took his touch."

He starts to shake, the tears falling faster. "What if all my decisions are just the worst for him?"

[castaside]

He gives Red a squeeze despite how fucking obnoxious he's being. He's drunk and sad, or happens. Like Macaque after his fight with MK.

"Then tell him you need honesty about his hurts. There's nothing else anytime can do, since hurts happen in every relationship eventually, it'll even happen to the Great She Equal to Heaven eventually. Treating him like a monkey, whatever that means, isn't a substitute for that."

"He'll stay with you as you work through it. And so will I."

[forgingfires]

"Lotta grooming and simple sounds, 'parently. Which is hard. I can't purr on command and if I moo, he's gonna be...be so weird about it," he said. He's absolutely going to coo about it being cute or something and Red Son WILL die.

He makes another small whine and buries himself further against him. Curling up against him. At least he seems to have stopped going for the bottle. "I didn't wanna hurt him..."

[castaside]

Oh, Red.

"Do you want me to teach you our chirping? If you can't make the sounds, you could make a device that creates them for you." If that would make him feel more secure...

"Beyond that, just have faith in him. You love each other. If you tell him that it's important to you that he express his hurts, he'll try his best."

[forgingfires]

"...I could make a device. I am very good at getting those tinny sounds out," he murmured.

"I do. I love him so much. Its stupid. He makes me stupid," he said. To a maddening degree, some days.

As evidence by all the bottles.

[castaside]

"You're smart enough to counter the stupid. We can approximate the monkey stuff. Build a nest together, rather than using his all the time. Make the device with chirps on it with his input. Make sure that if you're talking, you're holding him or grooming him. And a lot of things that he might suggest, too."

"It's not as complicated as you're making it, Red. You're upset and you have a right to be, but there's a difference between that and despairing. You want to be better for him, so do something. You're good at doing things."

[forgingfires]

"We did build his nest together in his room...don't know how often he has other people in it," Red Son muttered. With Macaque's scent all over them both and how much of Wukong is on MK, it can be hard to say where the scent is coming FROM. "Maybe a special nest...do finally have spare room expansions now. Maybe another present like his art room..."

"Maybe...maybe try to make the noises and...adjust. In a program. Since his noises might not work the same? Like talking to yourself. Unless he can self soothe that way. Maybe that's a thing, he does talk to himself." MK can be very chatty to himself sometimes.

"I do. I just...I don't know how to help him right now," he said. "Since a bunch of that I...can't really fully utilize." Not until MK is okay with touch.

[castaside]

"You can make the chirping device, I'll bet he'd get a kick out of it. But maybe the point is less to do something that you've devised will help and more just... spending time. You don't have to be talking about heavy issues every moment to be helping him."

[forgingfires]

"Do you really think just...spending enough time will help?" He asked, idly picking at his shirt.

[castaside]

"I really do." He kisses Red on the head, sticky mess and all. "It always helps me. Even now."

[forgingfires]

"I'm a drunk mess," he said, but leans into the affection all the same.

[castaside]

Another quick kiss, then. "I said what I said. And it takes a special kind of affection to be happy just being with you while you moon over someone else."

[forgingfires]

"You could moon over your people. We bonded over you trying to not moon over Wukong," he said. Bitching about your ex while still being super into your ex.

[castaside]

"I'm not especially in the mood to talk about Wukong, and you're not in a place to hear about him." And while Macaque could talk about how hard he's crushing on Wash, then it could come out that Macaque is more comfortable talking to Wash and that ends nowhere good.

[forgingfires]

And then there's MK, which may just getting him crying again. "Could talk about your kids. Cole. You seemed friendly with the Soldier," he said.

[castaside]

"Things are odd with Cole, the pillar thing really messed with me. And Wash... friendly is one way to put it."

And his kids he's not sure what to say about. He loves them, he'd die a thousand times for them, they're perfect, no notes.

[forgingfires]

"Hmm...too drunk for...pillar," Red Son muttered. "Friendly one way? He's not territorial over the kids, is he?"

[castaside]

Mmkay, then.

"Friendly as in we went on a date, and I hope there's more. He's a proponent of taking things slow. Not my specialty, but it's fun."