castaside | [Heart Game] From the ashes we can build

[ ... ]

[ oh. ]

[ oh, that hurts. ]

[ that hurts like a knife to the gut. like a thousand paper cuts, dozens layered upon dozens, one after another after another after another after ten, twenty, thirty at a time. a hollow agony with the weight of an anvil, an anchor, all sharpened points and inevitability. ]

[ korone stares at the painting, the tip of one finger still oh-so delicately pressed against it. ]

It is. [He said as she reaches out.]

[Then she is very still, just staring at the painting. He moves over to her.] Choco?

[ She doesn't respond. Or react at all, honestly; it's hard to say whether or not she even heard him. ]

....

[Oh, he's definitely taking the next one.]

[He gets up and is going to come and after some hesitation, hug her.]

[ He can feel the split second her reflexes almost, almost get the better of her. It's the start of a violent reaction that could very well end with someone getting put through a wall.

But she catches herself all but immediately, before she can hurt or yeet him, his scent registering - ]

- Donnie.

[Were spidershell hands extended to catch him just in case?]

[Maybe.]

I'm here. [But he is maintaining this hug]

Almost gave me a heart attack. [ He'll be able to hear her heart hammering in her chest, only starting to slow as she turns into his arms and presses her forehead into the crook of his neck.

Breathes him in.

Safety.

Home. ]

You okay? Did something happen?

I should be asking you that. You were gone there for a minute.

I'm —

[ she swallows thickly. "fine?" no. she's far from it.

and finally wraps her arms around him in return. ]

Just … lost in thought. [ her hesitation is palpable, but then, slowly, as her wings tuck in tighter against her back, ] It was rejection. Because he looked different. All he wanted was to belong, and they chased him off, out of the nest. They -

They were cruel.

[.....oh]

Most are. [He wraps his arms tight around her.] To what looks different.

Not all though.

Not all.

[ But enough.

It's enough, and those wounds can dig deep. They can fester. ]

They're why I always try so hard to hide my scars. One of the reasons, anyway. [ She has been making some kind of progress these past few months, though, as long as she's inside Birdtile house. It's slow and sometimes it's three steps back for every one step forward, but her loved ones have been helping her carve out a space that feels safe. ] ... So it hit close to home. Sorry for worrying you.

I hope ...

I hope we can be a safe space for him. A "home" where he can just be himself.

Of course it hit close to home. [They had been lucky. Their father knew what would happen. New York City had the advantage of ignoring A LOT of weird, but there was a line when it came to humans. They could get away walking around, even limited direct interaction. Bold faced standing out, however? That was another matter.]

[That way led to rejection and danger.]

Though I still think you look lovely.

We'll convince him. He's been able to keep them down these last few weeks. The glamours.

[ Her next breath shudders hard, and when she tries to laugh, it comes out ragged and tight, almost whisper quiet. ]

You're a turtle of taste. [ She presses closer. ] ... It's easier around you. You just ...

You see me. [ And he likes what he sees? She knows he does. She knows every compliment is the truth as he sees it, though she can't always believe it for herself. ]

And we see him. We can talk about it with him, maybe, or ... hah, maybe we can put up a few signs. [ She's half joking with that one. ] He can decide what he's comfortable with. He just has to know that he can be safe with us.

[ ... ]

Hey ... Donnie? Can I ask for -

... I guess it might be a weird favor.

[He pulls her close and settles on the ground. Reaching up to stroke her hair.] I have excellent taste.

And you are very bright.

We could have 'glamours not required' as a test. Let him know it's a safe space to decide.

Datemate can ask weird favors.

[ Ah, hairpets. Her weakness. Also cuddles. Also proximity to Donnie in general. In another place, another time, she'd likely burrow herself straight into his lap. ]

Glamours not required. [ This laugh, at least, is closest to something more normal, albeit still soft and very brief. ] Hmm. Wonder if he'd be more embarrassed about that, or ... if I painted the three of us together. No scarf, no battleshell, no glamours. What do you think-?

[ It'd be one hell of a statement. For all three of them. ]

... Okay. [ Mumbles, ] ... Could you bite me? Not to start anything, just - [ a reminder. a real, physical reminder that she can feel without touching. ]

[He considers.] The sign is indirect, and easier to ignore. The painting would be a direct attack on his heart.

I think maybe the sign and if he doesn't immediately leave after seeing it from embarrassment, THEN we try the painting?

Plus you need time to paint. I can have a sign up in thirty minutes. [Because it'll be ~fancy~]

....

Oh.

Shoulder or...?

[ Hmm, nods against his shoulder. ]

The wording might be edging towards too blunt? Hmm. We could workshop it, maybe ask Eve-chan. [ As someone who shapeshifts on the regular. ]

Maybe I could try to make a custom frame for the painting ... That'd definitely take me some time. [ It'd have to be GOOD. Something that complements the art. ]

[ The pause almost has her wilting. ]

Up, um, up to you. Whatever you'd be comfortable with, if you are. It's okay if you aren't.

Is it? Because that's why I wasn't thinking 'You don't need glamours.' Being not required means he gets to choose.

And he...doesn't seem to mind blunt?

A custom frame is very nice.

[Listen, the pause is because its a Shift in some serious gears.]

I meant...

Do you want neck? I don't know why exactly you want it so it should be what's helping you more?

It could be. I know I'd prob'ly feel self-conscious if I was in his shoes ... Touched, but self-conscious.

But it's always kinda tricky anyways, when it's something someone learned about in a heart game. [ HMM. ]

[ Ruffles and resettles her feathers. ]

S'because ... that memory ...

It stirred up some stuff. I feel unsettled and kinda icky and ... it'd be a reminder. That I'm here. With you. Someone who accepts me. So really, either is fine.

That's why sign before painting.

But when you're used to hiding, you'll assume you should be hiding. How could it be clear, but even less blunt than that?

He knew we were going to learn things.

[He hums. Then he's going to reach up for her scarf.]

So. Neck.

Different wording, maybe-? I'm not saying it's bad wording, it's just ... very directly about him. [ A thoughtful noise. ] If it was you ...

Would you be more comfortable with the sign, or a conversation?

[ She hugs him tighter for a moment, before loosening her grip to help him with her scarf — and the choker she's wearing underneath it. ]

The sign is very clear. Conversations are a die roll. I like clear.

Especially when its not a bad sign.

...are you adding more layers?

I'd ... maybe be more comfortable with the conversation? Ah, it's hard to say.

... So, I'll follow your lead.

[ There's.

A pause. ]

Um. Sometimes. [ She almost wore a turtleneck today too. Like, on top of the choker. She fiddles with the clasp. ]

He's....

Forgiving of mistakes.

If the sign is bad, he'll say. But then its something he can choose to engage with.

[...]

Choco.

Sweetie.

Beloved.

Darling sweetie pie caramel apple.

We have really either need to get you a dedicated tailor or therapy, you're going to keep overheating.

[ The longer he goes with the pet names the more she blushes, and then she's sputtering ]

That was one time! And some of my things are already tailored; someone [ RED SON ] gave me a really good recommendation ...

The choker and the scarf are both custom pieces.

Re: Level S (sub 1) - East Door

Re: Level S (sub 1) - East Door

Re: Level S (sub 1) - East Door

Re: Level S (sub 1) - East Door

Re: Level S (sub 1) - East Door

Re: Level S (sub 1) - East Door

Re: Level S (sub 1) - East Door

Re: Level S (sub 1) - East Door

Re: Level S (sub 1) - East Door

Re: Level S (sub 1) - East Door

Re: Level S (sub 1) - East Door

Re: Level S (sub 1) - East Door

Re: Level S (sub 1) - East Door

Re: Level S (sub 1) - East Door

Re: Level S (sub 1) - East Door

Re: Level S (sub 1) - East Door

Re: Level S (sub 1) - East Door

Re: Level S (sub 1) - East Door

Re: Level S (sub 1) - East Door

Re: Level S (sub 1) - East Door

Re: Level S (sub 1) - East Door

Re: Level S (sub 1) - East Door

Re: Level S (sub 1) - East Door

Re: Level S (sub 1) - East Door

Re: Level S (sub 1) - East Door